5 Best Gatorade Flavors to Cure Your Hangover
It’s been 50 years since the scientifically formulated beverage called Gatorade has exploded onto the scene and into our hearts, and from that point been the go-do sports drink for athletes around the world looking to replenish their bodies worn down by training and competition. As one of the most recognizable brands in the game, Gatorade continually conducts research and testing on how nutrition and hydration can affect athletic performance. Nutrition? Hydration? Performance? Drinking? I know we were all thinking it: these words practically go hand-in-hand.
Any serious athlete could tell you that the pains of gain, so to speak, are essentially nothing compared to the gut-wrenching hell that can be brought upon by a wicked hangover. At Gatorade’s inception, physicians at the University of Florida were charged with the task of understanding and solving the problem of why the football team players were getting sick from the intense heat and activity. Little did they know that in tackling this dilemma, they would be inadvertently providing an unprecedented hangover elixir to drinkers everywhere, many of whose athletic achievements are limited to buzzed intramural kickball. The two main elements sweated out through physical activity, water and electrolytes, are seriously depleted through the act of competitive and recreational embibement as well. The liquid content alone present in Gatorade goes a long way towards replenishing your body’s stores and alleviating hangover symptoms, and the electrolytes lost from frequent bathroom usage can be rebalanced throughout this necessary hydrating process as well.
Water is boring, this is a fact. Luckily, we have something better now. Although the flavor of Gatorade doesn’t particularly change the physiological benefits of this godly nectar, you can bet your sweet ass it has deep psychological impacts. And accordingly, we’re here to rank the best flavors. So that you don’t have to.
5. Fruit Punch
Many a people swear on this flavor as both their pre-drinking and post-drinking choice to combat the vicious effects of the notorious hangover. As one of the original recipes from our favorite hydrating beverage, it would be difficult to leave it off of this list. Refreshing? Eh, sometimes. For me, the fruitiness can be too much. Legend has it that there is nothing worse than an overdose of Red Gatorade. The saturated nature of this brew does however make it potentially the best choice of Gatorade for your mixing needs while actually drinking alcohol. One of our favorite medleys is the Gator Tail – 2 shots vodka (or rum) and 3 parts Fruit Punch Gatorade. Boom, an easy and refreshing summer drink (that you may very well need Gatorade to recover from during the next day).
4. Riptide Rush (Purple)
Although liquids can often be criticized for their lack of flavor or watery nature, this variant of the Gatorade Frost series is on this list for exactly those reasons. Maximizing your hydration on a warm day, Riptide Rush is the perfect choice for when your throat is closing up and you are dying of heat stroke or even worse, when you are hungover. Never too overwhelming, this refreshingly grapey experience is like the legal heroin of the sport drink hangover hydration scene. Or so we’ve heard.
Disclaimer: it’s actually been rumored to smell quite bad, but luckily is far tamer and more delicious in the taste department than most.
3. Glacier Freeze (Light Blue)
Refreshing. Crisp. Never disappoints. If not for the historical significance of the next two flavors, Glacier Freeze might take the top spot. Per The Huffington Post, this particular variant says this about its drinkers:
“You’re intelligent and have a refined palate. You know a good thing when you see it and you don’t hesitate to let everyone know when you’ve found it.”
High praise, I know. Although completely subjective in nature, if this analysis / compliment, combined with its actual great taste doesn’t convince you to enjoy Glacier Freeze, nothing will.
Aside from getting much-needed fluids into your system, Gatorade also excels in the fact that it has its own built in automatic rehydration indicator. When it tastes good, you should drink more of it. But once it starts tasting unappealing, this means you’ve had enough and you’re rehydrated. Sneaky, right? I know. Alright, moving on with the list.
Gatorade hits the spot every damn time, this we all know. Orange Gatorade is no exception to this rule. Your second-best option when (#1 spoiler alert) Lemon-Lime is sold out; you can’t go wrong with this one. See below for a personal favorite concoction, known simply as the “Orange you glad you’re not hungover anymore”.
- Orange Gatorade
- Original Alka-Seltzer
- Bayer Aspirin
- Combine all ingredients.
- Chug the hell out of it.
Unquestionably, this is the pinnacle of sports and therefore hangover drinks. Much like every time Gladiator is on TV, you know exactly what you are getting, but you will obviously enjoy it anyway because it’s probably better than anything else on at the moment. The original and also the best, this sunshine nectar has been the flagship of the Gatorade varieties since the beginning. The perfect combination of flavor, refreshment, and nostalgia, the yellow stuff has everything your hungover self could possibly want.
Pro Tip: In addition to its benefits once a hangover has started, Lemon-Lime (and really all Gatorade actually) also offers some pretty sweet prevention from getting a hangover. As you drink, consume this liquid throughout, and make sure to drink plenty before you go to sleep.
Bonus: Gatorade AM – Tropical Mango
Gatorade AM, how we miss you. This short-lived line aimed to target kids consuming Gatorade early in the day, which is odd because literally no human ever assumed they had to wait until a certain predetermined time of the day to begin their non-alcoholic drinking. To everyone else, however, this rollout was about the flavor, and boy did it not disappoint. Reaching near orgasmic levels in the taste and hydration departments, it truly is a tragedy that we are no longer able to freely chug this blend of exotic tropical fruit flavors at our leisure. R.I.P. Tropical Mango. You deserved better.
Gatorade is always an extremely effective option to help combat the Sunday morning blues after a night on the town. Utilizing this beverage can help you to replenish your aching body with H2O and electrolytes, and to rid yourself of the head trauma and nausea that your adult beverage of choice happens to inflict upon you. You’re an independent thinker. You make your own decisions. But as we’ve seen, not all Gatorades are created equal. This ranking should help you avoid the pitfalls of picking the wrong flavor of this dynamic drink and instead crush your hangover, so you can get out there and continue to crush it at the bars with little to no next-day repercussions.
Written by Zack Klush
Zack: Amateur ping pong player and professional massage receiver, Zack enjoys long journeys after missing his stop on the PATH train as well sneaking into concerts throughout the greater NYC area. Spending almost too much time as one of the handful of Philadelphia 76ers (read: worst team in sports) fans, Zack occasionally takes a break from yelling at his television to work at an advertising agency in Midtown. You can spot him pretty regularly ordering way too much food at The Taco Truck or getting beat by highschoolers in pickup basketball.